Thursday

I had a horrible night last night. I ended up crying myself to sleep. I got in a fight with Danny and I just wanted to be by myself. I also got a Happy Thanksgiving card from my brother Wayne. It just brought me way down, almost stressed me out. Wayne does not know our Uncle Lev was murdered. I have to find away to tell him in a letter, and well that just makes me feel down. Wayne is in prison about 8 hours from here, so I have to tell him by mail. I also have to tell him that his partner in crime and exgirlfriend, had a baby and is getting married. When they originally went to prison they promised to wait for each other, but she has been out for over two years. I can not even imagine how all this will make him feel. I do not write often and feel even worse that when I do it is all bad news. Last letter I got from him he wrote to ask for money. He only writes a few times a year. He said it is hard to write when everyday plays out the same way. I do not think stressed is the right word to describe how I feel. It is like there is a heavy feeling on my body. I do not know but I have to write him. On top of all this I have the worse cramps I have ever had. I am on another 3 month round birth control and this brand totally sucks. I have a head ache from driving home squinting at my windshield to avoid all the spin outs on the highway. It did not help that I had been at work since 5:30am and my eyes had that sting you get after a good night of crying. The puffy under eye look faded by 11am, thank goodness. OK enough depressing stuff I am off to bed with a heating pad and some Aleve.
Oh here is some health crap for you. I did eat clean all day but did not eat as often as I should.